


Scars

by Marauders_simply_the_best



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys Kissing, Hogwarts Sixth Year, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), Sad Remus Lupin, Scars, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:22:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25159195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marauders_simply_the_best/pseuds/Marauders_simply_the_best
Summary: Remus had always hated how his scars looked. But after an especially bad Full Moon, Remus gets new scars on his face and neck and Sirius has to convince Remus that he has no problem with them. Angsty Remus but with a happy ending because that's what they deserve.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 66





	Scars

Remus had always hated the way his scars looked, especially the ones on his face. He hated that they made him look dangerous. He knew he was dangerous, but he didn't like that it made even strangers walk far away from him, even in Hogsmeade.

Full moons were always bad but when he was feeling anxious or sad, the wolf was extra brutal. Before this full moon he had read in The Daily Prophet that a new law had passed in which werewolves had to tell their potential employers about their condition before applying for the job. This made him exceptionally sad and angry as he knew this would make getting job once outside Hogwarts even more difficult. So he was expecting the wolf to be angry as well. 

But he had not realised that the wolf would be so angry to actually slash half side of his face and neck. 

The moment he woke up he could feel the wound in his neck, it was deep, deeper than most of his other wounds. Few moments later he realised that his face also had a few gashes. And he could feel himself getting emotional because now there were atleast 5 major scars on his face. One on his right eyebrow to his ear, two running parallel to his nose on his right cheek and now the new ones along his left temple to his neck.

As if he didn't look hideous enough already.

How was he going to face Sirius, who he had started dating just few weeks back. How could he show him his face when he wished he didn't have to see it himself? 

After a few minutes, Madam Pomfrey came to collect him and took him back to the hospital wing and fixed him up the best she could, but he knew the scars won't go away. But being the brilliant healer she was, she made them as faint as possible. So the new ones on his face were lighter than he expected but the ones on his neck were huge, three long gashes the went down from his ear all the way to his collarbone. There were a few more on his chest and legs, but atleast they were hidden under his clothes. 

He went back to his dorm that afternoon and got into his bed. Sirius had classes and McGonagall had forced him to not miss his lectures after every full moon. So Remus had asked him to take notes for him and promised him that they could spend the entire evening together. So he slept till the classed had finished for the day and Sirius came to get him for dinner as he was quite tired.

He and Sirius had started going out since the end of last week's moon. He was lying in bed as he was tired and Sirius was fussing over him more usual. He asked Sirius what was wrong but he had just shrugged and said nothing. But after he insisted, he told him that he had started getting a crush on him. Sirius was never the one to back away from his feelings, rather he believed that there was no harm in telling the person about his feelings instead of keeping them bottled up. He was already out as Bisexual since their fifth year. It was now closing towards the end of sixth.

He had always had feelings for Sirius, but they increased after he was out. He didn't have the same brave heart so he kept his crush to himself. But when Sirius admitted his, they got together. 

They hadn't gone all the way in their relationship, only a snog here and there when they had alone time, strictly clothed, as he didn't want to expose more of his body to him yet. But Sirius hadn't rushed him, told him to take his time and that they had all the time in the world. But he didn't know how he could ever get past his shyness, how he could ever feel anything but shame about being the monster that he is. But he guessed with time he would get more comfortable with the idea of being free enough with Sirius to undress in front of him.

It was dark outside when Sirius pushed the curtains from his bed to wake him. He heard the others arrive in the room as well. He saw as Sirius' eyes widen slightly when he saw his new scars for a split second. But he didn't say anything about them.

"Hey moony, how are you? Sleep well? You have an hour to get ready before dinner." He said as he helped him sit up with his back to the headboard. He saw James enter, followed by Peter. They started getting ready for dinner.

"I'm fine, how were classes?" He asked but he waited for Sirius to ask about his new scars.

"They were okay, missed you. Feeling strong enough to walk or do you want me to help you get ready?" Sirius offered as he looked for the scrunchie Remus gifted him as a joke to keep his hair tied instead of using his wand like he did all the time last year. It had almost killed him everytime he did that.

"It's in the nightstand, Sirius. And no, I'll get ready myself" Remus replied know what he was looking for without saying. Six years of friendship had taught him most of his habits by now. 

"Hey Moony, feeling alright? We tried to visit you this morning but Madam Pomfrey wouldn't let any of us in. But she told us that you were okay. One of these days, we're gonna break her and make her let us see you." James let out a cheeky grin and ruffled his hair in a way to show that he was planning to use his looks to sway her which has never worked before. But Remus saw his eyes linger on his new scars. Peter, too, kept glancing them like he was trying to get used to these new additions to his face. But they too didn't say anything about those.

"You can try but I'm not sure she's going to fall for it. And as she said, I'm alright. Just have to take the Pain Relief Draught for the next few days because my muscles are still a little sore." He replied.

Sirius looked through the nightstand and found it immediately. "Thanks Moony, you do know me very well" Sirius said as he leaned down on Remus to kiss him.

But Remus pushed him away. He couldn't do this, not with Sirius not even acknowledging his scars. 

"James, Pete, can you give us a few minutes, please?" He asked without lifting his eyes from his lap, but they all heard the catch in his throat. They noded and went down to the common room with the chess set.

"Sirius, please. You can't kiss me like that. Not with these hideous things on my face. I don't expect you to be okay with them but please atleast give me some reaction. Something, disgust, pity, anything. Please." 

Sirius was shocked, because his Moony was crying and he didn't know what to do. But he knew he couldn't let him think like that.

"Moony, I didn't ignore them because I found then disgusting, I did that because I knew you were self-conscious about them. I don't pity you. I feel immensely sad that you have to go through these painful transformation every month and also get these scars as a reminder. I don't have any problem with them, in fact I find them pretty hot, makes you look badass, but I don't talk about them or go near them in our make-out sessions because I know that you are shy about those, that they are a painful reminder of having to turn every month. So I don't touch those. I hate that you have to hurt yourself every month and I can't help you with that. I thought that when you felt comfortable enough about them with me you'll tell me yourself. I'm sorry if I made you feel like I pity you or that I find those unattractive. You are beautiful, Moony. Truly Magnificent." 

At this Sirius sat down next to Remus when he let out a loud sob. He gathered him in his arms, pulled his face into his chest and held on tight. "These scars don't lessen you appeal. They are your battlescars and you should show them off proudly. I'm sorry if I made you feel any less beautiful then you actually are. I'm so sorry, Moony." He lifted his face from his chest and wiped the tears from his face. It took some time for Remus to calm down but Sirius kept brushing his hair as it always calmed him down. 

Then suddenly Remus hugged him with all his might and then pulled him in a kiss. He kissed back immediately but stopped it for a second, "Are you okay now? Not upset anymore?" He asked wanting to make sure he was fine.  
Remus nodded and put his hand on both of Sirius' cheeks, "I'm fine. Thank you, for all of this. I needed that. I just- When I saw the new scars, all I could think was 'I'm a monster' and that you wouldn't want to be with me anymore. And I guess I kind of needed the reassurance. So thank you for being patient with me."

"You don't have to thank me. I did what any good boyfriend would do. And if you ever need anymore assurance, you know where to find me." Sirius answered grinning and then leaned in again for a kiss.

He ran his tongue along Remus' asking for permission and when he got it, pushed in his tongue, playing with Remus', licking into his mouth. He sat in Remus' lap and ran his hands through his hair.

Remus moaned into his mouth and ran his hands down Sirius' back and slowly pushed his hands under his robes. 

Sirius kissed down his jaw and placed slow kisses along his scars, one by one, afraid of his reaction. When Remus just sighed happily, he continued the path down his neck. He kissed the new scars gently knowing they were still sensitive. But he saw Remus' breathing was getting uneven, in a good way, so he ran his tongue on them and sucked a hickey just besides the new scar, Remus moaned out loud. 

Fuck.

Remus' hands tightened around Sirius' waist and he lowered his hands down to his ass and squeezed taking in the supple flesh, having never gone this far before. He felt better then he ever did after a full and was enjoying the new sensations when the door opened and James peaked inside, "Hey guys, are you fin- Is this why you asked us to leave! Well you clearly are not 'finished' but I'm hungry and dinner is about to start. I'm coming in! Pete, you can come up now!"

Remus looked up at Sirius with a hungry look in his eyes and lips between his teeth but they couldn't continue with their friends in the room and awake. He wanted to go all the way, and Remus was sure that his need was written on his face. He knew Sirius understood his expression without words because he leaned down and whispered one word that he wanted, needed, to hear. 

"Tonight"

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first fic ever. I hope you guys liked it.  
> -A


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